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How To Win A Fight (Like A Man)

April 11th, 2008 · 287 Comments

fistfighters_small.jpgThere are a lot of guides out there on winning a fist fight, and most of them aren’t that useful. In my experience they’re either too vague, or spend half the time convincing you NOT to get in a fight, which is good advice in general, but that’s not why we are reading the guide, am I right?

Most people get in a fight at some point in their life whether they want to or not, and it’s better to be prepared for how things really go down. This guide will assume that you are fighting one person. If you are fighting more than one person you are pretty much screwed unless you are either armed, or SIGNIFICANTLY more powerful and trained than they are. If you are fighting a small group of two or three it is possible, though extremely unlikely that you could come out ahead. We will go over that later.

Mandatory Disclaimer: This guide is for regular dudes fighting regular dudes. If you or your opponent is a trained fighter, the strategies of course will change. If you think of anything I’ve left out, or you want to disagree with something in this article, feel free to comment below.

The Basics:
1. Know when the fight is going to happen. [Read more →]

→ 287 CommentsTags: random_manliness

Why Cartoon Chicks Are Better Than Real Women

February 24th, 2008 · 8 Comments

copyright jabcomix.com
copyright jabcomix.com

I recently had the awkward pleasure of explaining to my non-girlfriend why the prospect of boning Princess Jasmine was more exciting than the prospect of boning her.

After a few ambiguous mutterings about the smoothness of Jasmine’s animated curves and her spicy Indian attitude, I gave in and admitted that my real live non-girlfriend was much more attractive than any 2-Dimensional floozy.

This however was not true.

Jasmine is way hotter than my non-girlfriend or any girl that I have known, period.

[Read more →]

→ 8 CommentsTags: random_manliness